"I'll have you"

The television series, LOST, and Christianity have been compared a lot.
And it’s easy to see why.
There’s a strong sense of having a faith in the show. This may be faith in Jacob or the mysterious island or even themselves. There’s also a strong theme of good versus evil. In the final season, the episode “Dr. Linus” shows what I believe to be one of the most beautiful scenes yet in the series.

The dialogue that gets me is at the end of the clip:

Ben: “I was so angry. Confused. I was terrified that I was about to lose the only thing that ever mattered to me: my power. But the thing that really mattered was already gone. I’m sorry that I killed Jacob. I am. I do not expect you to forgive me, because I can never forgive myself.”

Ilana: “Then what do you want?”

Ben: “Just let me leave.”

Ilana: “Where will you go?”

Ben: “To Locke.”

Ilana: “Why?”

Ben: “Because he’s the only one that’ll have me.”

Ilana: “I’ll have you.”

That scene is probably a slightly different take than what most people see when it comes to Christian parallels in the show, but I love it. Oftentimes, people make the mistake of putting their faith in the wrong things. For Ben, he put his faith in Jacob. He did everything for this guy - including sacrificing his daughter. He did a lot of stupid things because what did he want? Power. How many things do we humans sacrifice so we can have power? For me, power may be sacrificing things so others will approve me and like me. In the end, this always gets me nowhere. Ben tells Ilana how he is so discouraged now that he has nothing. He’s broken and ashamed. I know this feeling. Ben feels he has no one to turn to, but Locke. And I’m pretty sure Locke isn’t going to have what Ben wants either.

The way Ben feels is oftentimes how it feels without God’s love. We feel no one can love us after all the crap we’ve done. But Ilana forgives, despite all the hurt Ben has caused her. The way Ilana accepts Ben at the end when she says, “I’ll take you,” is so beautiful to me. It reflects exactly how I feel about God’s love for me. When I have no one else there, God is still there with his arms open saying, “I’m here, Jennifer.”

What this clip doesn’t capture is the way Ben almost blindly follows Ilana after the dialogue ends. He doesn’t know how to accept this forgiveness Ilana is portraying. So he silently followers her back to the beach. It’s exactly how Christians feel. We are often overwhelmed with the love and forgiveness of God, but we follow Him because that is all we truly have in the end.